


In League With Satan

by Glamatton



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: AFAB reader - Freeform, Demon Sex, Demon/Human Relationships, Demons, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Insects, M/M, NSFW, Non-Human Genitalia, POV Second Person, Rough Kissing, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Snake Crowley (Good Omens), Vaginal Sex, im so sorry for everyone who accidentally finds this, is best hastur, lord save me for i have sinned, message me and ill pay for your therapy, naive hastur, this is the most embarassing thing ive ever written in my life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-11-17
Packaged: 2020-07-09 13:29:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 19,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19888594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glamatton/pseuds/Glamatton
Summary: You fall in love with Hastur and vice versa.💕✨🖤Matching playlist can be found here🖤 ✨💕My tumblr🖤My art tumblr🖤Our Hastur thirst blog





	1. Freezing Moon

**Author's Note:**

> Reader is afab, but if you have any tips on how to make it gender neutral, please send them my way because I literally have no clue. Also, English isn’t my first language so please excuse any weird phrasing.

Three in the morning. The infamous witching hour. Or demon’s hour in your case. You figured it would be the best time of the day to try to summon a demon. Or whatever other apparition may step out of the shoddy pentagram you drew on the ground with chalk. At least you hoped it would be a pentagram this time and you didn’t accidentally draw a star of David like on your first try.

In your hands you held a wikihow article you had printed out the day before. According to the article you summon a demon by drawing a pentagram on the ground and placing some tea lights along it.  
The article made the whole ordeal sound way too easy to be true. No way a demon or anything for that matter would actually step out of this.  
Apparently you had to be very specific with your wishes for the demon too, or you’d get scammed or even worse. Not to mention the type of demon you’ll actually get. It’ll probably be some really low ranking one. Some subordinate of some subordinate probably.

You lit the last tea light and put it on the ground. Now you just needed to wait. The first minute passed without anything happening. Then another one and another one. After five minutes of staring at your masterpiece you had almost given up hope already.

You were checking the time on your phone when you heard a terrifying screeching noise being emitted from the ground. Slowly a dirty hand rose from the ground, gripping the ground beneath it. Then another one, both with long claws for fingernails. Both hands were followed by some strands of dirty blonde hair, that seemed to have never seen just a drop of water. 

The unkempt hair framed the pale, tired face of a man. At least you thought it was a man. He looked old, much older than you. His pitch black scleras were complimented by similarly coloured eye bags. He slowly climbed out of the pentagram drawn on the floor, groaning with every inch he moved upwards.  
Fully erected the man let out another drawn out groan. He rubbed his back, stretched a bit while producing a disgusting sound and sighed.

“What human dares summoning me?” he screeched as he had finished his shtick. His raspy voice felt like nails scratching on a chalkboard in your ears and the way he menacingly stared right through your soul sent a shiver down your spine. You were certain this demon wouldn’t hesitate to devour you without hesitation if you just took a wrong step.

Dumbfounded you let out a slow “Hello”. You stared at him intensely, trying to figure out if you had finally been awake for long enough to experience hallucinations.  
The demon raised his eyebrows. “Hello” probably wasn’t the right response to meeting a demon judging by the way he looked at you. If you had caught this demon on a bad day and insulted him, your life probably would’ve ended right then and there. But fortunately this demon seemed to turn a blind eye to your blatant disrespect towards him and just gloomily stared at you.  
The man pulled out a clipboard and blew some black dust off of it. Awesome. You weren't looking forward to cleaning that up again.  
“Let’s see,” he murmured while writing something down on it. Pitch black eyes critically scanned you from head to toe. “Reason for summoning, human?” he asked.

You hesitated for a moment.  
“I just uh… wanted someone to talk to,” you answered, not quite truthfully. This was an experiment. A scientific one at that.  
“Talking,” he repeated as he wrote it down.  
“Is this a joke? I will tell you this once because I seem to have way too much patience today: Don’t try playing games with me, mortal,” the man dangerously growled, towering over you.  
“It’s not! I swear!”  
“You dared to summon a demon for… talking?”  
“Uh… yes.”  
“You are one curious little human. Interesting.... Not that I’ve seen a lot of your kind, mind you. It’s been… a while. Usually this isn’t part of my job exactly, but the usual people were busy. I prefer not to spend too much time on earth.”  
The usual people? You didn’t know there were demons responsible for customer interactions.  
“If you were trying to summon a succubus or incubus, they’re all booked out at the moment. If it’s that kind of talking.”  
You laughed flusteredly. Somehow you wouldn’t mind doing said talking with this peculiar demon, incubus or not.  
“No, no. Just talking. To be frank, I didn't think anything would come out of this,” you answered.  
You didn’t really know what to do now. Does the demon know what to do now? Do people summon demons often enough for them to have a routine for these cases? All he did was stare right through you with his fully pitch black eyes. You were trying hard not to look into them, it seemed impolite to stare.

After a few awkward moments you decided to take the initiative.  
“Would you like to sit down? Maybe have a coffee?”  
He nodded and gave you a crooked, but unexpectedly wholesome smile. What a rapid change in his mood. Not that you didn't welcome it.  
“Of course.”  
You led the demon into your kitchen and gestured towards the table. He took the invitation and sat down, his eyes still staring. He was slowly starting to make you uncomfortable with that. You turned your back to him and faced the coffee machine instead, which hopefully wouldn't start staring you down like that. Still, it seemed as if you could feel his cold eyes on you, like needles piercing into your back.

“Milk?” you asked as you poured some into the cup you made for yourself.  
“No thank you.”  
“Sugar?”  
“No.”  
“Sweetener?”  
The last resort to maybe save this cup of coffee.  
“No.”  
Confused you handed the demon a cup of pitch black brew, you wouldn't even dare to call it coffee. Yours resembled more a shade of caramel.  
“Thank you, human,” he growled, baring his teeth at you.  
You sat down at the chair opposite him and blew on your hot coffee. A few moments passed without either of you saying anything. You kept thinking about his coffee. How could anyone - demon or not - even dare to think of drinking that? It must be a demon thing to have bad taste.  
He took out his clipboard again, wrote something down and handed it to you. The demon pointed at a field for you to sign.  
“Would you mind signing this contract? Oh, and I also need you to fill out your personal data here, here and here,” he said and pointed at various points on the paper. You filled in your name and birth date and then signed at the bottom. This felt less like making a demonic contract and more like signing up for an insurance. You had always known that insurance people were closely related to demons.  
The demon had written down his name at the top, too.  
“Hastur, Duke of Hell,” you read out loud. What kind of demonic royalty did you accidentally call into your house?  
He nodded.  
“So… what kind of so to say services do you offer?” you asked.  
“That depends on what you ask of me. If you would like to keep this to just talking or if you want me to perform a minor demonic miracle for you. Or something fun like Murder, homicide… Whatever it is we can make it look like an accident. Basically whatever your tiny, mortal brain can think of.”  
“Well... “ you started while keeping your eyes away from him. “I wanted to solicit the services of an… Incubus I guess.”  
The demon laughed a high-pitched, dirty, disgusting laugh only demons could produce and you were instantly ashamed of what you just said.  
“I knew it. Well that’s not exactly my area of expertise. But… I suppose I could give it a shot. Make an exception.”  
You laughed embarrassed. No way he just said that. No way you just said that. No way any of this is happening.  
You mustered up enough courage to look at him and caught his eyes. He gave you a crooked, but still scary smile.  
“So?” he continued.  
“Um… sure….” This was the chance of a lifetime and by god you were gonna take it. Or by Satan. Besides, something in that man really caught your attention. You had no idea what it was but in some uncanny way you were strangely attracted to him. He must be playing demonic tricks on your mind.  
“Marvelous. We'll keep this off records though. I'd like to keep my reputation,” he said and finished the rest of his coffee in one sip. You shuddered and were instantly disgusted.  
Not wanting to waste any more time you did so as well with yours and got up. Your thoughts were racing. What now?  
Before you could think further the demon got up, let one of his disgusting hands run through his equally disgusting hair and coughed coyly. He wasn't nervous, was he?  
“So. What is the human routine for these things?” he finally asked, although very quietly compared to before. Suddenly he seemed very fidgety.  
“Routine? Ah well, I guess you could say that you usually take someone out for dinner or watch something together. And then you just kinda… you know?”  
“I understand.”  
That was a lie. He didn't seem like he understood anything and only got more nervous with each word you said.  
“You've done this before, right?”  
His expression suddenly switched to a very angry one.  
“I do not concern myself with unnecessary things like the pleasures of flesh. I have more important matters to attend to. Like Murder.”  
“Usually,” he added after a brief moment.  
It seemed like you had hit some sort of weak spot of his.  
“Anyway,” he took an aggressive step forward, invading your personal space. “I shall give it my best,” he said as he got even closer. There was barely any room between you two. You shuddered as he put one hand on your hips while his other one awkwardly made its way to your chin. As softly as he could he stroked your jaw bone and angled your face upwards. Putrid smell of rotten flesh and mud creeped into your nose, but for some reason you didn't mind it at all. He had to bend down a bit to reach your mouth with his but when he did he roughly pressed his chapped lips onto yours.  
It did feel like every other kiss, except for the knowledge that this man was a literal demon.  
When he pulled back you could see a flustered expression on his face.  
“That was... pleasant.”  
He sounded genuinely surprised.  
“Guess I get what Crowley means now.”  
You swore he added a frog-like ribbit at the end of that sentence.  
He whispered to himself before pressing another kiss onto your lips and even sneakily slid his tongue into your mouth. It is bad manners to keep your eyes open during a kiss, but you were too dumbfounded to close your eyes at this moment. Instead, you kept them wide open and just stared straight ahead.  
The demon started moving his tongue around in your mouth, removed his mouth from yours and then pressed it onto your lips again. It seemed like he couldn’t keep himself from you.

He softly moaned into your mouth and let his hands run through your hair. He gripped a bunch of your hair and roughly pulled your head back and stared deep into your eyes.  
“Am I doing good?” the demon asked.  
You nodded slightly and the demon before you answered with a wide, toothy grin. He pulled his mouth back and bent down a bit more, while pulling your hair up harder. Delicately he pressed his lips onto your neck. You closed your eyes and enjoyed the faint touch of his lips, but not for long. He suddenly opened his mouth and gave you a rough bite. You squealed in his firm grip to which he just laughed.  
The man took a step back and lifted you up. He did it with such an ease, despite his skinny and sickly appearance.  
“Alright, where’s your ...bedroom?” he asked. It seemed like he wasn’t quite sure if that was the right room to ask for, for such rituals. You led him to your bedroom. Thank god you chose a king-sized bed when you moved in, otherwise it would’ve been a problem to fit this tall man into it.


	2. Descending Angel

Hastur gently set you down at the edge of your bed.  
“Good human,” he murmured, patting your head. This probably would’ve been a good moment to ask the demon how old he was exactly. But demons don’t adhere to human ages, do they?  
Said demon sat down next to you and pulled you close, putting you on his lap. You gave him another kiss, which he seemed to enjoy very much.

Playfully yet still roughly he pushed you off of his lap and onto your bed. He gently bit your neck again and pushed up your shirt to reveal your bra. Gleefully you awaited his discovery of your carefully selected matching underwear. But this would have to wait since he only just got started on your upper body. The demon slid his shaking hand under your back to try to open your bra and reveal your breasts. He fumbled a bit with the clasp and gave up with a groan after a while. Instead he just pushed your bra up and circled your nipple with his rough hand.

It seemed like he was gaining more confidence as you two went along, but you could still feel a certain uncertainty in his hands. His face too, he looked at you, as if he wasn’t quite sure whether what he was doing was right or not.  
How strange for a demon. You’d have imagined them as prideful beings very certain of themselves, maybe a bit too much. After all, pride goes before a fall. A quite literal fall in a demons case. According to the bible every demon once was an angel, before it committed something so terrible, it was abandoned by god. You wondered what this particular demon's crime was. Nothing lust-related you were certain. Not like you could ask him anyway, so your speculations would stay just that.

A high-pitched groan ripped you out of your thoughts. The demon, still busy groping your breasts seemed like he was getting more and more into it. You decided to help him and softly pushed him off of you so you could remove your bra fully.  
His eyes widened as you casually threw your bra aside and it almost seemed like he was getting red under all the dirt and grime and disgusting warts on his face. If it was out of excitement or the stress of being put in this unfamiliar situation was up for debate.  
You decided to take it as excitement.

More importantly to you, and probably to him as well, he could caress your breasts freely now. Of course, he happily took this chance to sneak a few bites and kisses on there, next to the gentle kisses. Even if he wasn’t Hells designated man for this, he was certainly giving it his best.  
One by one his hands slid down to your waist, tucking at your trousers trying to undo them. His patience was running out. But you shook your head and tucked at his shabby excuse for a trench coat, which he was still wearing.  
“Not fair,” you pouted.  
Hastur let out an annoyed “Ugh” and started undoing said trench coat. Something told you he hadn’t washed that one in quite a while.  
Tossing it aside, he revealed an equally destroyed, undone suit, that looked like it was produced centuries ago. His tie was hanging half undone between both sides of the suit. When you were done with this you really wanted to redo it for him.  
He completely removed the tie, suit jacket and off-white dress shirt from underneath it, all of it joining his trench coat on the floor.  
His body looked like you expected it, scrawny, dirty and strangely scarred. You let your fingers gently follow the contours of his chest all the way down to his waistband. You slowly pushed your fingers down his trousers, testing the waters. The demon shivered and firmly pulled your hand away, holding it next to your chin.

  
He turned the tables and instead started undoing the button of your jeans. His hands were quick and rough. He didn’t care if he ripped your jeans in the heat of the moment. He could always just miracle them whole again. You decided to help him and just took them off completely revealing your matching lace panties. They’re uncomfortable to wear and you read that they’re bad for vaginal health once so you only pulled them out for the most important of reasons. Such as summoning a demon. Naturally.  
Of course, the demon didn’t notice. He probably didn’t understand the improbability of a human actually wearing matching underwear. He probably didn’t understand the concept of underwear in itself. He looked down at your knickers, then up at you directly with slightly squinted eyes and a confused expression. And then down again. You were sure he would appreciate it, if he understood its immense impact.  
Hesitantly he pulled them down after looking into your eyes to attempt to ask for your permission. After looking wide-eyed at your naked body in front of him he snapped his fingers and miraculously his trousers and the underwear he may or may not have been wearing landed in a dirty pile on the floor.

Now it was your turn to stare wide-eyed at his cock. It was… different. It resembled that of a human, but it sported weird black spots and its length and girth were concerning. The demon noticed your hesitance.  
“Is everything alright?”  
You nodded.  
“I'm… just surprised,” you answered truthfully.  
Your answer earned you loud cackling from the demon.  
Slowly you let your hands wander to his cock, softly massaging up and down the shaft. You couldn't even fully grip it with one hand. You were nervous just thinking about fitting that inside you, but getting it one with a demon is worth it. Hopefully.  
Hastur moaned quietly.  
“This is … nice,” he confessed.  
You decided to show him how much nicer it could get and bent down and slowly put your lips around it. It tasted disgusting. Even more disgusting than usually. But the groans of Hastur were worth it in your opinion. He got even louder and started biting his finger in order to refrain himself. His other hand gently trailed across your cheek and settled on the top of your head, searching for grip within your hair. Roughly he pushed your head further down his shaft, making you gag in the process. You weren't even halfway down and it was already too much for you. Hastur noticed you struggling and gently let go of your head. He seemed like he was getting impatient to finally be inside of you.  
“Come on, human,” he growled.

  
You abided and laid back on your bed, watching him give his cock a few strokes himself, then position himself in front of you. Slowly he pushed the tip of his cock inside of you, taking care not to hurt you. It was thick and uncommonly warm, almost hot. You were almost sure that the hotness was a demon thing. You let out a long moan as he pushed deeper inside you, filling you to the brim with his girth. You gripped his arms to signal to him to wait a few moments, so you could get accommodated to his cock. Hastur understood your signals and halted. You took a few deep breaths before nodding to him to make him move again.  
Hastur pulled his cock out a bit, before pushing it inside again, this time deeper than before.  
If this was what being fucked by a demon felt like, then you really needed to convince this demon to become a regular at your house. The way his warm cock pulsated inside of you and he coyly pushed forward was heavenly.  
“Oh, Satan,” he whispered as he buried as much of himself inside of you as he possibly could.  
He gave up his restraint, gripping your hips with both of his hands and brutally started thrusting harder and faster. Your frail human body seemed like a joke compared to the strength of his cock. At the same time you could feel him trying to hold back, unsuccessfully trying to keep part of his shaft out of you as to not hurt you.  
After many more strokes he started breathing heavier, moaning louder and digging his fingers so hard in your hips, it would probably leave some scratches.  
"What… what is this…?" he stammered.  
"You're cumming?"  
"I think so…" he moaned.  
He pushed deep inside you several more times, each stroke a little bit weaker, before collapsing onto you. While taking deep breaths, the sweaty demon rolled off of you.  
You could feel his cum leaking from you into your bedsheets, but you didn't care. Right now you were still exhausted from what just happened. Well that and the fact that it was 4 AM now, way past your usual bedtime.

The demon, still a sweaty mess, turned to you again and flashed his dirty teeth at you.  
"Did you enjoy it?" he asked.  
"I did."  
Well you did indeed enjoy it, even if you didn't cum from it.  
"I'm… glad."  
The demon gave you a pat on the head and slowly made his way out of your bed. In an instant he was dressed again and ready to tackle whatever demonic tasks he still had to do tonight.  
"Well, human…" ´he started "I'm terribly sorry I can't stay longer, but I have some important business to attend to. But you know my name now so you may summon me again another time. If you'd like, I mean."  
You nodded.  
"Well if you're up for it, haha," you laughed awkwardly.  
"Of course. Sleep tight, human."  
He didn't even wait for an answer before disappearing from your bedroom. Not that you had time to even think about his rudeness. Instead you rolled on your side and instantly fell asleep from your exhaustion.


	3. Heaven's On Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I take ages to post anything lol So just have this short chapter of cute Hastur fluff while I try to get my ass to write more

You woke up to an excruciating pain in lower abdomen. You wondered what it could be, if maybe you were getting sick, but then you remembered. You knew exactly what happened last night and why it hurt like that. If it hadn’t hurt, you would’ve written it off simply as a very obtuse wet dream, but no. You really did seduce a demon somehow. Well, maybe seduce was an exaggeration, but you did fuck a demon. That’s something to brag about. Not that anyone would believe you if you told them, but it was a neat little achievement for yourself so to say. Maybe it was an achievement for the demon too, he seemed very excited about his assumedly first time doing that.  
Your clothes were still on the floor, you were still naked and your mattress was a mess of dried semen and sweat. Disgusting. You rolled out of bed and ripped the gross bed sheet off your bed, picked up your clothes on the way and threw it in the laundry bin. You had to take a shower and you had to have it now, you already felt way too dirty as is.

You spent the rest of the day hooked on painkillers, hugging a hot water bottle and binge-watching a sitcom that should’ve remained in the 90s for good. Your thoughts kept going to that demon from last night. Naturally, of course, after all you had met a demon that night. Quite the extraordinary feat for a human. More importantly though, said demon said he wants you to summon him again. Which opened the question: How soon is too soon to summon a demon again? Was this question to be treated like the human problem of calling someone back after a first date?  
The wiki-how article you used last night didn’t help. In fact, it didn’t make any mention of demons asking you to summon them again or them being sympathetic towards you in any way, shape or form. So you concluded that it must be a very rare occurrence. Which was cool and exciting, of course, but also meant that there is not a lot of people that could help you with that. You were on your own.  
You wondered what Hastur was up to at that moment. You’d like to imagine he was in Hell, bragging about finally seducing a human, earning applause from his fellow demons. Or he was tempting some poor souls on earth, condemning them to an afterlife in Hell. Or maybe he was taking the demon equivalent of a nap after this exhausting night. If demons get exhausted that is.

After a long debate with yourself about Hasturs day and how to deal with this you decided to wait until the next day to maybe try summoning him. And to do it during the day, since you’d really like to get some sleep, so you could survive the next day. 

Even though you were itching to summon Hastur again first thing in the morning you decided against it. Instead, you decided to finally do household chores you had been putting off for about two weeks. Next time Hastur visited your house would be as clean as your internet search history. Maybe that would make him stay a little longer. Or maybe you should try to bring in some extra dirt to make it more homely for him?  
Besides scrubbing your flat you also decided to go get groceries, so you wouldn’t have to solely live off take out and frozen pizzas you had stocked up on the last time they were on sale.  
While you were making your rounds in the grocery store you kept turning around, expecting someone to be right behind you. Every time you looked behind you however, the thing that may or may not have been following you, vanished. You really hoped it was Hastur lurking behind you, making sure you got home safely, but you were smart enough to not believe in that. After all, a duke of Hell had better things to do than to follow mere mortals around.

You re-used the summoning circle you had made a few days ago, this time at three in the afternoon. Again you lit the tea lights, placed them were you had placed them before and sat down in front of the circle to wait. You didn't really know how to summon Hastur specifically, so you just hoped for the best.  
You expected to have to wait for quite a while, just like last time, but surprisingly that wasn't the case this time. After just about a minute the tea lights began to flicker ominously and black smoke filled the room. Out of the smoke a man, assumedly another demon, stepped. Said man was carrying an iguana on his head and stretched his hand out to you. Confused you accepted the handshake.  
"Greetings, mortal. How may I help you?" Iguana man asked.  
"I think I got the wrong demon. I was trying to summon Hastur. I think."  
The man gave you a skeptical expression.  
"Hastur doesn't answer to the calls of mere humans. Where did you get his name from anyway?" he asked visibly confused.  
"He told me to summon him."  
The man shook his head.  
"I heavily doubt that. Anyway, what's your concern?"  
"I want to talk to Hastur."  
His expression changed from confused to visibly annoyed.  
"Listen, I'm not going to disturb Hastur in his work just because some delusional mortal said he allegedly told them to summon him. Either you-"  
Suddenly the demon was interrupted by growling coming from the summoning circle.  
The demon you had actually wanted to summon slowly stepped out of the smoke.  
"Back off, Ligur," he growled as he stepped between you and the other demon.  
"Hastur? What are you doing here? Shouldn't you-"  
"I was summoned. Bugger off."  
You decided to take a step back and remove yourself from the two demons discussion.  
"Why does this human know your name?"  
"None of your business."  
Hastur stepped towards the other demon, towering above him. The other demon flinched and backed away from him.  
"Hell will hear about this," he growled before disappearing, taking the black smoke with him.

Hastur turned towards you. Suddenly he seemed very on edge.  
“Human.”  
“Greetings, your grace. Your highness. Your…”  
You awkwardly smiled at him.  
“It’s your disgrace.”  
“Greetings, your disgrace.”  
The demon chuckled at your butchering of demonic traditions.  
"Your innocence as to who you're talking to is intoxicating, human. Any other human talk to me like that and I'd eat them alive. Literally."  
You weren't sure if that was a joke or if he was being deadly serious. You dearly hoped it was the former.  
"But alas you are such an interesting little critter,'' he continued. “I think I want to keep you around for a bit.”  
What an interesting compliment.  
Hastur stretched out his arms and eagerly stared down at you. Was this him inviting you into a hug? You decided to close the gap between you both and put your arms around him. His intense smell of cigarettes, putrid flesh and rotten carcasses almost made you throw up.  
Still Hastur kept his arms wide open.  
“Hastur? If you want to hug someone you have to actually put your arms around them,” you carefully, as to not anger him, informed him. Slowly his hands carefully rose around your shoulders.  
“I see,” he mumbled.  
“What do you see?”  
“You humans like to be held because it reminds you of the womb. Humans like being in the womb.”  
Bewildered you looked up at him. He looked as if he got it all figured out now.  
“I- I don’t think that’s it. I mean I’m pretty partial towards being in the womb. I think it’s just that bodily contact is nice.”  
“You like bodily... contact?” He pondered a few seconds about this statement. Suddenly he pulled back, just as you were starting to get used to his putrid smell. “Right! I have a gift for you, human. Close your eyes and hold out your hands.”  
You did as you were told.  
Suddenly you felt a cold sensation on your hands. It almost felt like he had dropped a crawling pile of… something into your hands. You opened your eyes again and almost started shrieking.  
Indeed, in your hands you held a pile of crawling maggots, who were probably just as confused as you were. You tried your hardest not to throw them back at Hastur.  
Said demon was looking at you with a surprisingly excited and complacent expression.  
“Thank you…,” you stuttered. Hastur smiled.  
“I knew you would like them. They will provide you with lots of bodily contact. Take good care of them.”  
You awkwardly laughed before taking off to the kitchen and threw the maggots into an empty jar of jam. You lightly put on the lid, allowing some air in, but making sure your new pets couldn’t escape. They found their new home on your kitchen table. After Hastur was gone you would rehome them somewhere where you wouldn’t have to look at them as frequently, but for now this would have to do.  
Defeated you sighed and made your way back to Hastur, who was still awkwardly standing in your living room.  
“Thank you… they are very… crawly.”  
You awkwardly laughed. 

“So human. Would you like to engage in a more… human mating behavior? Like food?”  
“You’re asking me out for dinner?”  
“Whatever you may call it.”  
“Sure. There are some restaurants nearby, what do you feel like?”  
Hastur became silent. It seemed like he hadn’t thought that far. After a few seconds of quiet pondering he opened his mouth again.  
“...There’s multiple types of restaurants? Just… you choose one.”  
“Yes, you see… There’s like Chinese restaurants, Indian, Italian-”  
“Italian sounds great, I like that.”  
Luckily for you there was a mediocre Italian restaurant about ten minutes from your house. You didn't think Hastur had very high expectations towards food.

Hastur patiently waited by the door while you put on some shoes and a coat. He didn’t have to get ready, after all he had been, much to your disdain, waltzing around your flat with his dirty shoes anyway.  
You both made your way out of your apartment, onto the bustling street outside. Well you went first and Hastur lingered behind you, trying not to pull too much attention to you two. At least you hoped that was his intention.  
You slowed down a bit to walk next to Hastur. Judging by his facial expression he didn’t seem like a particularly big fan of the sun.  
“Is everything alright?” you asked.  
Hastur nodded.  
“Just not very fond of this weather,” he mumbled.  
You could see where he was coming from, since he was still clad in his dirty trench coat.  
“You don’t want to take this off? The weather would be way more endurable without it.” you asked while tucking at the coat.  
“No.”  
You decided not to press any more questions and instead just silently walk Hastur to the restaurant. A particular thought, however, kept crossing your mind. Were you two far enough to hold hands? His hands didn’t seem particularly appealing, of course, seeing how rough and grimy they were. Still, your eyes kept drifting towards them, longing to reach out and grab one.  
“Hastur?”  
“Yes?”  
“Do you know about the… human ritual of holding hands?”  
Hastur went quiet for a few seconds.  
“As in actual hands?” he asked.  
You nodded.  
“I’ve done it.”  
No way he had actually held hands with a human before. You could hear him humming weirdly happy.  
“Cut them clean off. That was fun.”  
You shrieked out of disgust.  
“Ew! No! Not like that! There’s… another form of handholding. Less literal,” you explained.  
You took Hasturs hand with yours. “It works like this.”  
Surprised Hastur looked down at your hand.  
“What does it accomplish?” he asked.  
“Nothing, really. It just feels nice, doesn’t it? It’s a sign of affection, I guess. Maybe even love.”  
“Love…” he muttered. “That’s a very human thing. Maybe even the most human thing. Interesting. How do you recognize love?”  
He was really going for it with that question. How do you recognize love? You took a moment to think about it, but you didn’t manage to get to a satisfying conclusion.  
“It’s a feeling when you really want to be with someone. And really enjoy your time with someone,” you tried to answer. To be honest, you never asked this question yourself.  
“I think I love you then,” Hastur laughed.  
Your eyes widened as you awkwardly laughed. In some way this old demon not understanding love was incredibly endearing. Luckily for both of you you had reached the restaurant by that point and you were spared of any more of Hasturs deep questions about humanity.


	4. Funeral Fog

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short chapter, I seem to be doing better just posting short chapters more frequently :>

“What’s spaghetti?”  
“It’s noodles. You know what noodles are, right?”  
The demon sitting across you just silently kept staring at the menu in front of him. You were certain he didn’t know what noodles were. Both of you were seated at a small table, hidden in a corner, which was, of course, chosen by Hastur. Not that it was a bad thing, it was probably for the best of both of you not to attract too much attention.  
“Of course I do,” he growled.  
That was a lie, you were certain.  
“Well.. found anything that tickles your fancy yet?”  
He confusedly looked up to you again.  
“How are these things supposed to tickle me? I’m not ticklish anyway. We demons don’t have that mortal weakness.”  
“Please don’t say that you’re a demon too loud in public. People might get confused. Or scared.”  
“Fine.”  
Hastur hid his head in the menu again.  
“I’m surprised you know what ticklish means, anyway.”  
“Don’t be silly, human,” he growled. “I’ve picked up my fair share of things while up here. Including your weird rituals.”

Your discussion was interrupted by a waitress arriving next to your table.  
“Have you two made up your mind yet?” She asked.  
“I’ll take some spaghetti and a pint of Lager, please,'' you answered. You decided on spaghetti, since you figured it would be a hard thing for them to mess up. Hastur helplessly looked to you.  
“I’ll… take the same,” he murmured.  
The waitress hummed happily and took off.  
“You know what beer is?” You asked, doubting him.  
“I was there when it was invented. Oh, I remember that day as if it was only yesterday. I think it was about… 5000 years ago, maybe. I wish it had been Hells idea to invent alcohol. But to this day you humans always invent the most useful things yourself.”  
Hastur chuckled heartily. It seemed like you had managed to dig out some buried nostalgia of his. Somehow the way he oddly smiled to himself, trying to hide it by lowering his face was strangely…. adorable. You never expected yourself to use the word adorable when describing a demon in the form of a middle-aged man, though but it really was the most appropriate word for how you felt.  
“Well… what else did we invent that’s useful to Hell?” You asked interested.  
Hastur thought for a bit, still silently grinning.  
“You Humans invented war. Pollution. Weapons. A lot of things, now that I think about it. Sometimes you just needed a little nudge towards it.”  
You nodded. What he was saying did make sense.  
“Not to discredit my fellow demons inventions, of course. Personally I’m not much of an inventor myself.”  
The world of demons and angels was truly a fascinating one. Demon inventors. What kind of things would demons invent, if it wasn’t guns, war and pollution?  
Suddenly you remembered what you had been meaning to ask Hastur since you had set out towards restaurant.  
“By the way… What’s up with that other demon? The iguana-guy?”  
Hasturs villainous smile immediately vanished from his face.  
“He’s a ... colleague of mine,” he muttered.  
You waited for him to continue, but he just stayed silent. For whatever reason he really didn’t feel like talking more about him, but now it had piqued your interest.  
“You work together?”  
“Right.”  
“Are you his superior? He seemed to really respect you.”  
He shook his head.  
“Whatever Ligur may have said to you… just ignore it. He’s a duke of Hell like me, does similar things. Let’s leave it at that.”  
You still weren’t done digging.  
“Who’s your superior then? Do you two have any, anyway?”  
Hastur let out a long, annoyed sigh and stared at you with his piercing pitch black eyes.  
“Curiosity killed the cat, dear human. But it’s in your nature, so I can forgive you for that. And I used to ask too many questions myself, however long ago it already may be. “  
“So?”  
“I do have one superior, the prince of Hell. Above that there’s only Satan himself. And his, dare I say son.”  
You almost choked on your own spit.  
“Son?!”  
Your vis-a-vis soberly nodded.  
“The spawn of Satan. Still a young lad, though, he just recently turned 11. He’s supposed to bring on the apocalypse.”  
“Apocalypse?!”  
Hastur cheerily laughed.  
“Yes. The final battle between Heaven and Hell, which we will win, of course. It’s a shame your earth will be obliterated as I have grown quite fond of it. It has it’s good sides, but oh well. Victory will be worth it.”  
Was he really speaking the truth? He didn’t really have a reason to lie to you, but you really didn’t want to believe it.  
“When is this…. apocalypse?” You asked.  
“It’s soon. Real soon. We have about a week left.”  
You suddenly went quiet. In about a week your planet would be destroyed, taking you and all your loved ones with you? No way. You hoped he was just messing with you. But didn’t he himself talk about his absolute disdain for jokes? Maybe scaring the Hell - or Heaven?- out of mortals with distasteful jokes was the sole exception?

You were quite thankful as your discussion was once again interrupted by the same waitress bringing you your orders. Maybe you should’ve ordered more than just one pint of beer to deal with this shock. Right after she set down the pint next to you you took a big sip of sheer desperation out of it.  
After the waitress disappeared again Hastur slightly turned his head to the left and looked at you questioningly.  
“Is everything alright, human?” He asked, with what might be a hint of concern in his voice.  
You nodded and mopishly picked up the fork next to your plate to poke around in your spaghetti. For whatever reason you suddenly had lost all of the appetite you had managed to rack up while talking to Hastur.  
“You mortals are bad at lying and you know it. What’s the issue?”  
You decided to just keep silent and shove a big fork of noodles into your mouth. Your obvious gesture seemed to anger the demon.  
“Spit it out. Not the noodles, I mean. What’s bothering you?”  
“Nothing,” you mumbled with your mouth of noodles.  
Hastur leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms.  
“I see how it is. You’re upset about earth I assume?”  
You reluctantly nodded. How come demons weren’t able to read minds anyway? They could do all of these things, but reading minds was out of the question?  
“I do understand why you’re upset,” he murmured.  
Hastur critically ogled the pin in front of him, carefully picked it up and sniffed it, as if he wasn’t quite sure if it’s drinkable. Deciding that it was indeed drinkable he took a small sip and screwed up his face as he put it down again. His disgusted, scrunched up face made you giggle slightly as you forgot about earth's gloomy future for just a moment.  
Having tried the beer, you observed him picking up the fork and stabbing it into the noodles, just like you had done before. He carefully turned the fork around, winding some noodles around it and stuck it into his mouth. Just as mopish as you he chewed on it.  
“What do you think of it?” You asked.  
“It’s… fine,” he growled after he was done tasting the noodles.


	5. Blow Your Trumpets Gabriel

In about a week all life on earth would be obliterated. Completely destroyed. Leaving nothing behind. Well... maybe cockroaches could survive Armageddon, after all these animals were rumored to be able to survive a nuclear apocalypse. You for one certainly didn’t have the survivability of a cockroach, not to your knowledge at least. Maybe Armageddon would put your survivability to a test.

“You really shouldn’t worry about it too much. Well, of course a few humans are going to die. But it really is for the greater good.”  
You flat out refused to say anything to that. You wouldn't believe 7.6 humans were “a few” for the demon on the other side of the table. Almost, just almost you had thought Hastur had developed a liking to you. Apparently though it had been nothing but a fluke. You were nothing special or interesting to Hastur, just another human he just casually fucked and took out for dinner on the side. Maybe humans and demons weren’t that different from each other.

“Let’s just finish up and pay.”  
Hastur raised his eyebrows.  
“Is the food not good? The spaghetti?” He asked.  
You slowly sighed and picked up the fork in front of you again and stuffed a bunch of noodles into your mouth.  
“It is. I guess.”  
“Pardon me. I forgot you humans don’t like being reminded of your mortality. Although you should probably adapt a different view towards it, really.”  
Your noodles almost got stuck in your throat. The audacity of this demon was unbearable.  
Still you decided to just stay silent. Even though you were fuming, it didn’t seem like a wise idea to start a fight with a demon.  
“I’m done.”  
You weren’t really done, but this discussion had really taken a toll on your appetite and general ability to eat. You let the rest of the beer run down your throat and leaned back in your seat.  
“So am I. I think,” Hastur replied. He hadn’t touched his food, apart from the one shot he gave it. Neither had he touched the beer again.  
You looked for the waitress and raised your hand slightly to signal that you wanted to pay. 

When she arrived she sat down the bill in front of Hastur. She probably assumed this was a date gone sour, judging by both of yours facial expressions and the leftover food.  
Surprisingly for you, Hatur whipped out a small leather wallet, just as torn and dirty as his general appearance was. There were probably some maggots residing in there, you thought.  
Hastur pulled a few odd bills out of the wallet. You didn’t recognize them at first, but looking closer they seemed to be £100 bills.  
“I think this is enough. Just… keep it. Whatever’s left,” he growled at the waitress whose facial expression was a mishmash of distraughtness and overexcitement.

Both of you got up and quickly made your way out of the restaurant.  
Outside you halted. You really didn’t feel like doing anything with this demon now, much less anything romantic.  
“I think you should leave now, demon,” you angrily whispered at him, careful not to attract attention.  
Said demon raised his eyebrows in surprise.  
“What’s wrong, human? You’re not up for mating anymore? Are you feeling unwell?”  
You took a deep breath in.  
“I’m not. I have things to take care off, now that I know the world’s death date.”  
You slowly stomped off, back to your home. You didn’t dare stomp any faster.  
Neither did you dare look back, but you probably would’ve snickered at the confused face Hastur must have been pulling in that moment.

Quick footsteps behind you signalled to you that Hastur had started trying to catch up with you again.  
“Human!”  
As an answer to him yelling after you you just started walking faster.  
“Human! Come on!”  
Even faster walking, but to no avail. A cold hand tightly gripped your right shoulder and turned you around.  
“Stop this silliness, human,” he shushed at you. His face was scrunched up angrily, some loose strands of grey-blond hair hanging in front of his face.  
You gripped his ice-cold hand and removed it from your shoulder, more gentle than you had planned on doing.  
“I’m sure you have business to attend to as well. Armageddon preparations and all.”  
Hastur snickered.  
“We’ve been finished with the preparations for ages. We aren’t like you humans, we don’t delay things until it’s too late. So no, I am free right now. As free as I could be, probably. And I’m certain you are, too.”  
The demon took both of your hands in his. Long, bony fingers wrapped themselves around yours, almost making you shiver at his touch. You hadn’t noticed how cold they actually were until that moment. Reluctantly you tried to pull your hands away, but the demons grip was too tight.  
“Stop puzzling your sweet little human head about Armageddon. It will be absolutely beautiful, I’m certain.”  
Carefully he rubbed your hands together and drew little circles with his thumbs on the backs of your hands.  
“So we are going back to your home?” Hastur continued.  
Very, very reluctantly and slowly you nodded.  
“Fine,” you growled.

Walking next to each other along the path you had already taken on the way there, none of you dared to say a word. You, for one were too annoyed and distraught by the bad news. He on the other hand just seemed contempt that he had managed to calm you down.  
It was about halfway to your apartment when Hastur quietly reached out to you. Slowly and very carefully, he put his hand around yours, awkwardly shoving his fingers between yours. He still had the iron-tight grip he had demonstrated earlier.  
“Am I doing the hand holding right?” He asked.  
“Yes.”  
“Marvellous.”  
His cold, tight squeeze was surprisingly comforting, although in a kind of morbid way.


	6. Raid the Convent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is short because I'm on a 3 week student exchange in Russia right now and don't have a lot of time to write. So have this slightly smut chapter to read while I try to write while being escorted into a gulag  
> Люблю вас, друзья <3

Gently you let your fingers run across Hasturs old, rotting shirt. Having his tie already removed you started with the first button, slowly undoing it, teasing the demon below you. Facing him you were sitting on his lap while straddling him.  
After making it to your apartment safe and sound you both just kind of landed on your bed in this position. Not that you weren’t still mad at him, the opposite really. It was just that your lust for Hastur was overriding your feelings towards the end of the world for a short period of time. 

“You know, human, I hadn’t planned on finding these rituals quite this entertaining.”  
“So you’d really never done this before?”  
“I told you I’m not the kind of demon for these things,” Hatur calmly said in response.  
“But there’s other demons who also have?”  
“Of course there is. Temptation is our business.”  
The second button was finally opened by you, then the third, exposing even more pale, putrid flesh. The disgusting stench emitting from his body seemed much like the smell you expected to find in a morgue. You would've gagged if you weren't so terribly used to it already. Still you tried your best not to inhale too much of it. Who knew what this hellish stench could do to your body if given the chance.

Slowly you drew small circles on the skin you just revealed, causing Hastur to shudder at your gentle touch. You circled the protruding big black warts on his chest that seemed like they were going to fall off every moment.  
Your hand wandered upwards to his neck to draw soft lines, starting at his jawbone and meeting their ends at his collarbone.   
“These things you are doing feel very interesting. Please continue, human,” Hastur managed to squeeze out between quiet moans.   
You took some time to silently admire the dark grey veins growing from his neck towards his chest, even if you didn't like the way they looked or how they looked on him, but there was something drawing you towards them. You pressed your fingernails into his skin and traced them, leaving behind light red marks.

Hasturs mouth opened slightly at every touch as if to demonstrate the desire growing in him caused by your fingertips sliding along his skin.  
His own fingers however were tightly clenching your waist, gripping harder every time you decided to touch him.   
Out of the sudden the demon dared to try some experiments on you as well as he let his hands wander upwards to your neck to hesitantly emulate the motions you were making on him. His sharp fingernails almost penetrated your skin as he dragged them up the back of your neck.  
You unwillingly gave your hands a break as you shuddered because of Hasturs demonic touch, his hands were so cold it made almost all of your body hair stand up. The back of your neck was cold, but inside of your lower abdomen there seemed to be a passionate fire growing.  
Gently the demon allowed his hand to wander to your front to grip your throat. Carefully he restricted the airflow to your body, almost making you feel a bit lightheaded, but at the same time adding fuel to your fire of lust. 

Also growing was the bulge of Hasturs pants, when you looked down you could see just how much his trousers were being strained by his cock. Just like your insides had been strained the last time you summoned him.   
You slightly grasped your air when he finally let go of your throat. You decided to stop the demon from further inspection of your neck and put your lips on the side of his neck to gently nibble at the skin. This close to Hastur you were not only getting a full nose of his demonic stench, but also a taste of his skin. It didn't taste like any normal human skin, even though the basic taste was there. It was being way overshadowed by some sort of rotten taste, some that probably resembled the taste of a long dead corpses skin. Besides that you could also notice a strong taste of tabaco and smoke being mixed with the taste and smell of decomposition.   
You took your mouth off of Hastur   
"Say, Hastur, do you smoke?" You decided to investigate.   
He nodded.  
"An unruly habit I picked up on earth. It's an interesting habit of you humans as well, inhaling things you shouldn't be inhaling."  
Instead of further caressing his neck you decided to continue removing his clothes.   
Again you put your hands on his chest and again you opened another button.

Now you were getting a way closer view at Hastur than on your previous meeting. His skin was riddled with the warts you were accustomed too, but there also was an abundance of scars and things that seemed like half open wounds, seeping with some sort of black liquid, bearing resemblance to blood, but not fully. Part of you was grossed out, another morbid part however was used to the demon and almost even getting turned on more.  
You were tempted to put a finger to one of the wounds and tamper with it, but you didn't want to pull Hasturs wrath on you.

Refusing to look at the wounds further you finished opening Hasturs shirt to let it slip off of his skinny shoulders. Your attention wandered to his trousers, letting your hands run over his clothed cock, feeling Hastur as well as his dick jerk in response. His hip bucked into your hands when you firmly gripped his bulge.  
"Human," the demon moaned. "Please..."

You obliged to this request and quickly opened the buttons on his pants. As you pulled his underwear downwards, his dick seemingly jumped towards you out of excitement.   
It was just like you remembered. Just as the rest of his body his cock was riddled with black marks and warts, resembling some kind of disgusting disease. Transparent liquid was already dripping from the tip, showing just how ready Hastur already was to be deep inside you. The size hasn't changed either, even though you were prepared for it it still almost gave you a heart attack.

Gently you circled the tip, picking up some precum with your fingertips. Slowly you stuck your finger in your mouth, licking the salty precum off of it. The pure sight of this made Hastur groan in response and his cock slightly jerk.


	7. Angelfuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soon I'll be back in Germany and can properly write again :'D

Slowly you let your fingers glide over Hasturs hard cock before deciding on a place to grip on to. Gently you pushed the foreskin upwards, letting it glide over his head and then back again. You repeated this motion, this time just a little bit faster. Taking your eyes away from his cock and to his face instead, you tried to judge what tempo he preferred from his facial expression.  
As your hand went slower again, but gripped his cock a bit tighter, you could notice Hasturs eyes slowly rolling back and a quiet moan escape from his mouth. Your grip getting harder and your strokes just a little tad slower and more sensual seemed to make his moans louder and his hands creep up to your waist to find a spot to hold on to.  
The old demon closed his eyes and let his head softly roll back, all the while still letting out unexpectedly loud moans. The way he moaned, even though he seemingly didn't want to, the way he held onto you as if his life depended on it and his eyes occasionally opened to reveal his still rolled back eyes…. It all made you incredibly wet. Even more than that, you were almost scared of leaving a wet spot on Hasturs pants.

To kind of help with the heat in your lower body you, while still jerking the demon off, switched from sitting on Hasturs lap to sliding your leg between his and reserving your spot on only his right leg. Slowly you moved your lower body, pressing yourself against Hasturs leg, feeling some kind of relief. You went harder and faster and suddenly you felt yourself joining Hastur in his moaning.  
Before you could continue further, Hastur slid his hands under your crotch and roughly started rubbing, making you feel even better than you already were. All the while you started moving your hips again, pressing into his rough hands.

To your surprise it seemed like Hastur was enjoying himself too, just looking at and touching you. Both of you were soon reduced to nothing but just a moaning mess. After a while, in your state you of course didn't know for how long you had been doing this, you decided to take it further. Slowly you were getting bored of just being touched above clothing.   
Hastur was violently ripped out of his dazy state of enjoyment as you tore your shirt off and threw it to the side. Your bra, matching your knickers of course, immediately followed after.  
Just as wide-eyed as the first time Hastur took in your chest, let his hands run over your hardened nipples and seemed generally very contempt with what was happening. 

"Human I…," he hesitantly mumbled. "I thoroughly enjoy seeing you like this."  
"I hope this is a good compliment," he followed with, immediately after.  
You giggled at Hastur giving his best to give you a good, human compliment. It was surprisingly sweet for the demon.  
"It's a very good compliment," you assured him.  
"Good."  
You stepped off of Hastur to take your pants, as well as underwear off. It felt a bit weird, to completely expose yourself in front of him, but his almost dreamily dazed eyes made it way more comfortable for you.

Seeing you, Hasturs hand slowly wandered downwards to his cock, giving it a few gentle strokes in anticipation of what was to come. He stood up just a little bit so his pants dropped down a bit and his cock had more space. You sat down on his lap, his hard cock pushing against your stomach, still dripping with precum. You took his cock in your hand and slowly rubbed it against the outside of your private parts, making Hastur shiver in the process.   
Steadily you held his cock as you got up and slowly sat down on it. Just like the last time, the feeling of it almost tearing you in two made you feel light headed. 

You started slowly, just pushing the tip in, hoping you would somehow stretch a bit to accommodate for the rest of it. All the while Hastur, still hesitantly letting out moans, patiently watched you.   
When you felt like you were as ready as you could be, you started pushing down further. Each push made his cock vanish further into you, and each one gave you more anxiety of internal bleeding.

"You're pathetic, human."

Confused you looked up from your doing. Did he just call you pathetic? Hastur shot you a just as confused look back.

"Is this not an appropriate thing to say? I'm sorry, I just… heard you humans liked these things."

You continued to push downwards again, shoving almost half of his cock inside of you.  
"Continue, Hastur. Please. I mean, I like it," you squeezed out in between moans of excitement and exhaustion.   
"You're doing such a good job for a pathetic human," Hastur continued. "But I think you can fit more..."  
Encouraged by his less than kind words you slipped down further on his hard shaft.

"Oh, you're…"

You abruptly made him shut up by pushing him all the way inside you. Not wasting any time you pushed yourself up again, staying there for a brief moment, before making him sink into you again.  
"You filthy little human are so good at this," Hastur moaned.  
His words made you move faster and faster, leaving Hastur to be the mess he was when you had his cock in your hand once again.

"I love seeing you like this, human"

Your hands gripped into Hasturs shoulders to support you, while his hands were tightly buried in your waist, making you move up and down in his own pace. Which meant fast. To add to this he started moving his hips, trying to bury his cock inside you as far as he could.  
You started squirming as he made you ride him faster, leaning back and closing your eyes so you could wholly concentrate on his cock mercilessly hammering into you.  
Almost on its own your hand wandered downwards, so you could help out by rubbing, almost overstimulating yourself in the process.  
Unconsciously you started rubbing faster and faster, causing the heat inside your lower abdomen to build up. When you came to a point where you almost couldn't take it anymore you started whimpering.

"Hastur…"

The demon answered by giving you an especially hard push.

"I'm coming, Hastur," you moaned.

"Good human."

Suddenly you felt a wave of relief and happiness wash over you. Your eyes snapped open, but all you could see was black. The demon below you was still thrusting inside you, although way slower, as he was now concentrating on watching your face.   
After a few seconds your sight came back, but a certain dizziness remained.

Satisfied you pulled yourself off of Hasturs cock and slipped to your knees. You took Hasturs cock in your hands and started stroking it, before wrapping your mouth around it, bobbing your head up and down.   
You could feel Hasturs hand start to grip your hair, pushing you further down the shaft.

"You're doing such a good job, human."

His cock had the rotten taste as the rest of his skin, maybe even worse. Coupled with the grueling smell of decomposition oozing out of him it made your eyes water.  
Roughly Hastur pulled your head up again. Your tongue swirled around the tip, before you were being pushed down again.  
His hip jolted upwards as you slid down his shaft, making you gag, but he didn't seem to care.  
After a while of unrelentingly fucking your mouth he started whimpering.

"Human, I…"

Questioningly you looked up to him, only to be shoved downwards again.  
"I think I'm coming, human," he moaned as he tightly kept your head fixated at the base of his cock.  
Hot liquid shot down your throat as he kept trying to push further into you, trying to bury himself in your throat. It tasted incredibly salty, mixed with a strong taste of what you thought was tobacco.  
Hastur let go of your head and you pulled yourself up. It took a lot out of you to swallow the hot concoction that had just been placed in your mouth, but you did it anyway.

"Such a good human," Hastur praised you and pat your head. You smiled at his praise and got up to go clean yourself, but Hastur caught your hand to hold you back.  
"Am I allowed to stay for a while?" He asked reluctantly.  
You nodded.  
"You want to stay the night? Sure."  
He shot you a toothy grin and let your hand go.  
You rushed to your bathroom to clean your mouth in your sink. As hot as you found his demon cum, the taste it left in your mouth was almost unrivaled in terms of disgustingness. You also decided to take a shower, as Hasturs smell seemed to have rubbed off on you, as well as some of the liquid from his wounds.  
You opened the glass door of your shower, but before you could step inside you were taken aback. You had probably just had the best idea you had had in maybe months.

Still in all of your naked glory you rushed back to your bedroom, where Hastur was seemingly waiting patiently for your return.  
"Say, Hastur, what do you think of taking a shower? With me, I mean?" You asked the surprised demon.  
Hastur took a second to think, then nodded.  
"What's a... shower?" He slowly, hesitantly asked.  
You were taken aback, another time, of course.  
"It's… cleaning yourself. Basically."  
"Sure, I'll try it."  
No way this demon didn't know what to clean oneself meant.  
Hastur got up and awkwardly held his hand in front of his body.  
"So… where do we do this activity?" The demon asked.  
"In the shower. In the bathroom. You know what?" You motioned for the demon to get up,"Just follow me."

"Okay, Hastur, I need you to take all of this off, yes?"  
"Fine."  
Few moments later the floor of your bathroom was riddled with Hasturs remaining clothes.  
You opened the door to your shower and shoved Hastur inside, following immediately after and closing the door. There wasn't much space to move around in the shower as, of course, it wasn't meant to accommodate two people. You snaked your way around Hastur to reach the tap, brushing against his chest in the process.  
As you turned the water on Hastur unsuccessfully suppressed a shriek when the first drops of water hit his head. He closed his eyes and quietly accepted his fate as he, and you, got wetter and wetter.  
"What do you think of it?" You asked the demon while reaching for a bottle of bubblegum-flavoured shower gel and closing the tap.  
"It's very wet."  
You laughed and poured some shower gel on your hand. Before putting it on Hasturs chest you hesitated.  
"Is it okay if I touch these? The wounds, I mean?"  
"They're already centuries old. Go ahead."  
Now with Hasturs permission you circled your hands on his chest, carefully touching the wounds and wiping away the ominous liquid seeping out of them. Hastur didn't flinch or react in any way as you touched them so you assumed it didn't hurt. You made him turn around so you could clean his back too, but noticed something odd. You noticed two long, dark scars situated on the upper half of his back.  
Carefully you cleaned them as well, along with the rest of his skin.  
"What are these scars here?"  
"My wings."  
You audibly gasped.  
"You have wings? I need you to show me!" You demanded.  
"Some other time. They take up quite a bit of space."  
You nodded excited. Your imagination ran wild, thinking about how Hasturs wings might look. You imagined them to be majestic black swings, although withered and riddled with the usual warts.  
Patiently Hastur allowed you to clean his body, getting rid of a bit of the stench he was carrying around.   
"Give me that." Hastur growled and pointed at the bottle of shower gel. You obliged and handed him the shower gel. A bit heavy-handed he squirted a bunch of it on his hand, then on your body. Following your example he rubbed his hands on your body, making you into a bubbly mess.   
"Alright, that's enough," you said after a while of him messing around with your body. You turned on the water again and rubbed the soapy sud off of Hasturs body, revealing an almost human skin-colored body beneath.   
"How do you feel?" You asked, looking at your clean masterpiece.  
"Wet. Smelly," he answered hesitantly, with maybe a hint of annoyance even.  
"Good?"  
"Maybe. I'll have to think about this further."  
"Do that."

You cleaned yourself up as well and then pushed Hastur out of the shower again. You took a step back and assessed your work. His appearance could best be described as a sad, wet rat. You handed him a towel which he just kind of held in his hand, staring you down. Grabbing your own towel you decided it was best to just show him how it's done, drying yourself, which Hastur hesitantly started to mimic as well.   
You wrapped your towel around yourself and pointed to Hasturs clothes pile on the floor.  
"You can get dressed again," you soberly informed him.  
Hastur nodded.   
"You should get rid of this," he murmured while plucking at the towel around you. "You look better without it."   
You laughed at his awkward compliment, but inside you really appreciated it.  
"Maybe later."

Both of you, you dressed in pyjamas and Hastur in his usual attire, were firmly secured in bed, finally ready to sleep. You had explained the concept of tucking someone in to him, as well as the importance of turning the blanket around every now and then, since the colder side was just always better by principle. Hastur of course didn't really understand this and just kind of dismissed it as more weird human rituals.  
"What do we do now?" Hastur asked, blankly staring at the ceiling, awaiting further instructions from you.  
"Now we do this," you turned to him and pressed a kiss on his forehead. "Good night, Hastur."  
Hastur eagerly nodded and roughly pulled your forehead to his lips, giving you what he thought might resemble a human kiss.  
"Good night, human."  
"Don't let the bedbugs bite you."  
"What's a bedbug?"  
You sighed as you turned off the little lamp on your night stand, which had been the only thing illuminating the room.  
"I'll explain it tomorrow," you said and smothered yourself against Hastur, which he happily welcome by putting his arm around you.

Almost half an hour passed while you contentedly cuddled yourself into Hastur, inhaling the scent of a freshly washed demon before your eyes snapped open. You stuffed a bit of blanket into your mouth before releasing a muffled scream into it.


	8. From Hell They Came

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for not updating in so long! Had to get used to uni after spending so much time in Russia haha  
> Btw theres a matching playlist if anyone wants a backdrop for this fic lol  
> https://open.spotify.com/playlist/63vZvDl63yDOfVD9Xk4aB8?si=BShU5WGUR2CE_vFhuxzdAA

"Get out of my sight before I get a crucifix and make you."  
"Y/N. Calm down-"  
"Don't you dare start calling me by my name now, demon."  
"I understand you're upset, but please do keep an open mind…"  
"Leave!"  
"I'm not going to."  
"I don't want to see you anymore. I truly hope you lose your so called final battle with Heaven."  
Without any further words the demon nodded and got up, miracled his clothes back to his body and left the room, hopefully your apartment as a whole. Agitated you threw the pillow he'd been lying on after him, missing his head by just an inch.  
You let out a long, drawn out sigh of pure fury and anger and pushed your head into your pillow.  
You had had it. You had had it with Hastur and you had had it with him seeing the fate of the world as just a casualty. There were better ways to spend the last 6 days of your life with than with this pathetic excuse for a demon. You were both angry and disappointed with yourself for not even entertaining the thought of spending this precious time with your dear friends and loved ones and instead sinning in the arms of an actual demon.  
Slowly your eyes began to burn and it didn't take long for the first hot tears of despair to roll into the pillow. Few tears became a continuous stream of salty water running down your cheeks and quiet sobbing changed into loud wailing.

You were a complete fool for trusting and letting a demon into your apartment, as well as bed, even. The sudden thought of Armageddon had ripped you out of your rose-tinted daze and thrown you right back into the bitter reality of being the only human knowing about Armageddon. Of course you couldn't tell anyone about it, lest they would declare you completely bonkers. And you didn't want to risk having to spend your last few days at an institution.  
Quickly you grew weary of crying, your eyes slowly drying up and closing instead. Suddenly your wet pillow seemed incredibly comfortable and the residual warmth of Hasturs body lulled you to sleep.

Waking up you expected to be face to face with Hastur, but instead you were greeted by an empty left bedside.  
Of course, you had commanded him to leave last night.  
Immediately you got up and made your way to the kitchen, scouring for food. There on the counter you were greeted by your new bunch of pets patiently waiting on you. You sighed as you inspected the jar. You wanted to be disgusted, but somehow you felt empathy for Hasturs maggots. They must have been just as hungry as you. You took a piece of bacon from your fridge and graciously threw it to the hungry beasts, who didn't waste any time getting to work. What a nice parting gift of Hastur you thought.

A few quiet days passed, which you used to bestow your friends and family with surprise visits. It felt weird acting around them like you weren't aware that the world would be ending in around 3 days. Hastur didn't show up anywhere, nor did you feel a shadow creeping behind you as you went out. It felt like the demon had completely erased your existence from his memory. You wished you were able to do the same, but alas you couldn't keep yourself from thinking of him from time to time.  
Your new friends had grown considerably in the last few days, so much that you had to re-house them into a bigger accommodation. In all of your kindness you had actually gone out and bought a terrarium for then to reside in. To keep yourself from thinking too much you had also spent a considerable amount of time decorating it, painstakingly gluing sticks together and carefully arranging leaves. Sometimes you caught yourself giving them names. The fattest one always being Hastur, that is.

After your daily feeding and naming routine you felt a familiar smell creep into your nose. Looking around there was black smoke seeping from the cracks in the wood under you, taking in the entire room. Slowly a familiar demon emerged from the ground, looking even worse than he usually did.   
His ashy skin was grimier than ever and you almost suspected him to have grown a few extra warts. His hair was messier and greasier than usual, looking like he had spent the last few days pulling at his hair in despair.  
"Greetings, Y/N." He growled as usual.  
Resisting the urge to fling that man into the sun you answered.  
"What are you doing here, demon?"  
"I've made a terrible mistake." The demon wailed with a sincerity in his voice it almost made you concerned for his wellbeing.  
"But," he continued "I know how we can fix it."  
"We?"  
"We. I don't want to admit it, but this time I actually do need help from a mortal."  
You silently eyed him up and down, trying to concern if you were the butt of a terrible joke here.  
"I know you're still upset," he continued. "But! But… I've spent the past few days surveying a traitorous demon, one that is trying to prevent Armageddon with his little…. white-feathered friend. And watching them I've been… contemplating."  
"What do you mean contemplating? I'm sure a Demon has better things to do than to lurk after one of his kind."  
"I was assigned to it. It wasn't my choice. I just happened to notice them carrying out human mating rituals. Which made me feel… something. Some kind of anger, Satan knows. But not a bad one…-"  
The Demon started fumbling around with his hands nervously, staring at the ground beneath him.  
"Can you get to the point?" You asked him agitated.  
"Of course. So… these things they did, they differed from ours. Which made me realise that I would very much like to try them out with a human. Immersing myself into human culture for further study, you know?"  
"I'm not here to be your personal subject of study."  
"What I'm trying to say is: I've gotten very attached to you. And the thought of the world vanishing alongside you has been giving me a sort of grief I'd never experienced before."  
You hesitated at the Demons sudden vulnerability.  
"How do you plan on undoing this, then?" You asked.  
"Well… this traitorous Demon seems to have been working on a plan already."  
"He's your colleague I assume?"  
Hastur clenched his face in disgust.  
"You could say that. I guess. The point is that he's very distrusting of me. Which is where you come into play. If I show up with a human alongside he'll be willing to collaborate, I'm sure."  
"You mean I'm just a means of negotiation?"  
"No, no. He's been dying to meet you, it's actually been incredibly annoying. He's a big fan of humans, more so than me. Actually he's been helping me with this thing..."  
What an interesting turn of events, Hastur getting his human relationship advice from another demon.  
"Fine. Where's your Demon friend, then?"  
"Well… right now he's residing in Hell."  
"I see. I'm guessing were taking a trip to Hell, then?"  
"Correct."

He seemed to notice your less than excited face.  
“Don’t worry, we’ll just be there to visit. For now.”  
That last part didn’t sound very assuring.   
“What do you think?” he asked.  
“I'll trust that your intentions are genuine,” you answered. It wasn’t like you could fight it. Hastur had made up his mind already.  
He took your answer very enthusiastically and stretched his arms out, pulling you into an actual, almost human hug.  
This time, however he seemed to overdo it. He was squeezing you so tightly, your head was slowly getting lighter and your feet felt like they were starting to burn. It felt like flames were licking at your legs.  
After a few seconds of agonizing heat you finally passed out.

You didn’t remember how long you were out or what happened during it.   
The first thing you heard was Hastur repeatedly whispering “Human!” into your ears. Slowly you lifted your eyelids, the world around you still shaking. You could see the blurry silhouette of who you assumed to be Hastur.  
You groaned at him.   
“Human! I almost thought I had killed you.”  
Great.  
The ground beneath you felt wet and mossy and it felt like you were lying on wet concrete. An unbearingly disgusting smell crept into your nostrils. It smelled almost exactly like Hastur did. The more breaths you took in, the more disgusting it got.  
You lifted yourself up to sit down on the ground. Hastur was kneeling next to you, showing you his toothy smile.  
You really expected Hell to be warmer. Unlike your expectations of what Hell was like, this felt cold and moist. Not that that was pleasant either, but it seemed like a better option than burning in the fiery pits of hell for an eternity. You also noticed that a bunch of maggots and flies had given you their companionship on the ground, some even crawling up your legs. Irritated you shook them off.   
Hastur got up and gave you his hand, which you used to pull yourself up to your feet.   
“This is my workplace,” he exclaimed, way too excited for someone talking about literal Hell. 

You looked around. Just now your senses had fully come back to you and you noticed the noise of mumbling and the crumbling of papers going on around you. The room you were in was filled to the brim with people, all of them looking a lot like Hastur. Clothing-wise that is.   
But Hastur had changed. His dirty trench coat had been replaced by an even dirtier, barely being held together one. His hair was gone completely and had instead been replaced by a frog. Actually, inspecting it further you noticed that it was a toad. Said toad was holding tightly onto Hasturs head, occasionally blinking his eyes.  
Seemed like this was his companion in Hell.   
"Stay here, will you? I'm just making sure it's clear," Hastur whispered before dissapearing into the crowd.

As you inspected the room, you saw a sign hanging on one of the mossy walls. “Do not lick walls.” You wondered what happened for this sign to be made. As you were inspecting it you felt something slither up your right foot. You looked down and shrieked at the sight of a sleek black snake making its way up your leg. You tried your hardest not to scream too loud, scared to pull attention towards you. The serpent quietly slid up your body, wrapping himself around your arm.  
“You’re wondering about that sssign, aren’t you?” the snake hissed into your ear.  
“I am. Why can’t I lick walls?” you asked in return. Since you were in hell you could probably just expect animals to speak here.  
“No reassson. It’s a rule to be broken. Breaking rulessss is a custom here. Do it. Do it ssssssoon.”  
If you wanted to fit in you had better follow the customs. And a hellish snake would know best, wouldn’t it?  
You got close to the wall and hesitantly opened your mouth. Slowly you put your tongue out and gave the wall the smallest of licks.  
“Human?!” Hastur cried out from behind you and gripped your shoulder. Your serpin companion instantly vanished into a bunch of black smoke.  
“What were you thinking?” he irritatedly hissed at you.  
“A snake told me to!”  
Hastur shook his head.  
“Bollocks.”  
Hasturs hissing attracted the attention of some of the demons next to you two. Wide-eyed they stared at you, whispering to each other.

Hell’s other occupants quickly started gathering around you, mumbling continuously and ogling at you menacingly. Suddenly there was a whole crowd assembled around you. All of them held a respectable distance between them and you.  
“What is thissss nonsense going on here? Who's been licking the wallsssss?” A voice yelled out from the crowd. A small demon with a gigantic fly on their head pushed a bunch of demons aside and squeezed themselves through the crowd.  
If looks could kill the glare this demon shot at you would certainly have killed you at point blank. But you weren’t the only one receiving said glare, Hastur had the same privilege.  
“You dare bring a human here, Hastur?” they shrieked. “What’s gotten into you? First I hear about you being in bed with a human and now you bring this… thing with you?”  
Without saying a word Hastur stared down the other demon.  
The fly-wearing demon glared at you again.  
“I can’t risk you getting the word out. Sorry for Hastur’s incompetence, but your little life ends here,” they growled.  
Hastur stepped between you and the small demon.   
“Do not dare to touch this human, Beelzebub,” he snarled. Surprised Beelzebub took a step back. You could hear the crowd of demons letting out a just as surprised “Oh”.

Another demon pushed their way through the crowd into the circle in the middle.  
“Alright kids, what’s going on here?” he asked. Somehow he seemed noticeably more clean than all of the demons in hell combined.  
“This is none of your business,” both Hastur and Beelzebub snapped at him simultaneously.  
The clean demon took his place next to you. He stretched his hand out to you, which you gratefully took. At least someone here knew what manners were.  
“Anthony J. Crowley, but call me Crowley. Everyone does. Nice to meet you, Y/N. I've heard lots about you. Good things only, of course.” His voice was incredibly smooth compared to the ones of the other demons you had met so far. He put both hands on his hips.  
“You’re fighting over who gets to seduce the human first? I’d say Hastur first, since he picked them up, Beelzebub, I think you can wait for-”  
“You shut your mouth, Crowley!” Beelzebub screamed.  
Crowley looked at you. “Told you.”  
“Leave this to us!” Hastur joined in on Beelzebubs anger.  
Gently Crowley put his hand around your arm and pulled you back from the two other Demons.  
"If this turns too sour I'm taking us both to safety," he whispered into your ear.  
"What about Hastur?" You whispered back.  
"He'll be fine. Besides, if anything happens to you I'm dead meat."


	9. Cool For Cats

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm on new meds and now I'm an unstoppable force of creativity and the will for writing lol. This chapter may or may not be based on my own experiences lmao

“I’ll make you an offer: You get to keep the humans head as a keepsssake.”  
“No.”  
“Sssstep forward, human. I can smell that you’re still here,” the Demon, assumedly Beelzebub, called out to you.  
“Alright that’s our cue, Y/N. We’re leaving,” Crowley hushed at you as he pulled you closer to him. “I’ve never transported a human before. At least not from Hell. Hope I don’t leave a piece of you here.”  
Unlike Hastur this particular Demon seemed to have a clue about practicing personal hygiene, as evidenced by the pleasant, almost flowery smell coming from him. He took a deep breath in, before closing his eyes and angling his head upwards. Again you felt flames lick at your legs, but this time they were way less aggressive and more like a familiar warmth taking over your body.  
“Crowley! You ssstay here, I still have a bone to pick with-” The small demons voice slowly faded into the back of your mind as you seemingly drifted to sleep. Your body felt light, lighter than ever before. All your thoughts had seemingly been replaced by the thought of a warmth fire crackling.

Again you were unsure of how long you were out. You just knew that you had been asleep or rather passed out for assumingly a while. When you slowly opened your eyes your gaze was met by warm sunlight dancing on your skin and a warm smile unwillingly put on your face. Your body was still pleasantly warm and your back was being supported by soft grass under you. Your demonic companion was sitting next to you with an ice cream cone in his hand, looking around him.  
Still a bit dazed you sat up as well. All around you was green, in front of you a small river flowing happily. Faint chattering of people could be heard, as well as the cries of several magpies.  
“Oh, you’re finally back!” Crowley greeted you heartily. “I was almost afraid I had killed you. Wasn’t bad though, right? You looked pretty happy.”  
You chuckled. Indeed you felt amazing, like you had just gotten the perfect amount of sleep.  
“I do feel good, yes. Way better than when Hastur did this…”  
The Demon laughed.  
“Yeah, I’d imagine. He usually doesn’t bring anyone around. Oh, right!”  
Like he had just remembered something important he reached into the air around him. A small current of air formed around his hand, obscuring it.  
“Got one for you too,” he smiled, “What flavour do you like? Ice cream, I mean.”  
“Chocolate chip is great.”  
His face seemingly started glowing happily.  
“You know what's good!” He laughed as he pulled an ice cream cone out of seemingly thin air and handed it to you. Curious as you are you gave it one small lick. It was indeed chocolate chip. Did demonic powers extend to creating ice cream out of air as well?  
“I’m very curious by the way. About you and Hastur. I need you to tell me everything. Everything. All the juicy details, pretty please.”  
“Where do you want me to start?”  
“Where did you pick him up? It’s not an everyday human thing to seduce a Demon, I mean.”  
“I tried summoning an…” You took a lick of your ice cream, “Um… Incubus. Somehow I got him, though.”  
The other Demon erupted into loud, sneering laughter. It took a few moments for him to gather himself again.  
“If I had summoned an Incubus and gotten that instead I’d have clocked him,” he said, starting to giggle again immediately after finishing his sentence. You joined him in his laughter, gleefully filling your belly with air and happiness.  
“Well… he said Hell was short on Incubi. And beggars can’t be choosers, right?”  
Crowley nodded.  
“Indeed. That entire division is booked out until next year. Seems very popular with you bunch. Deviants, you are,” he shot you a bright smile. His teeth were white enough to almost blind you.

Slowly you eyed his head, starting at his short, ginger hair. Sunrays bouncing off of it gave it a soft glow you wouldn’t have seen from anyone else’s hair in a thousand years. On the side of his head you discovered some kind of tattoo, a snake like shape twining around itself. His face was sharp and angled, high cheekbones matching his sharp jaw. His eyes however were obscured by a pair of pitch black sunglasses. It seemed like he had something to hide about his eyes. Seeing as how Hastur possessed his fully black eyes, his might be of a similar nature.  
“It’s my turn with the questions. I heard you’re dating an Angel? Isn’t that like forbidden?” You asked.  
Crowley's face first turned a paper white shade, then a bright red one. Having seemingly lost his cool attitude he nervously laughed.  
“We are friends… just friends,” he choked out.  
“I won’t tell anyone.”  
He looked down at his hands, then up at you and then down again.  
“Well,” he started, “I’m not sure what we are. If we are anything, I mean. We’ve been friends since the beginning of time. Literally, I mean, we were in Paradise together. I still remember his newly formed wings…”  
Dreamily he gazed towards the stream and took a deep breath. It seemed like that Angel had really done something to him.  
“He would like you,” he continued. “He’s in love with humankind as a whole. Always seeing the best in everything and everyone… wait!” He snapped back from his love induced daze. “You’re not trying to divert from you and Hastur, are you? I’m still not done questioning you! Has he gotten the hang of showing affection yet? I’ve been trying to teach him some.”  
You nodded.  
“Kind of. He’s… a bit slow in that regard. But he’s trying.”  
“As to be expected from that old man. Unlike me he’s always hated earth and humanity, which is why I was so surprised when I heard about you.”

Your mind wandered to Hastur. It only occured you in that moment that he was probably still in Hell facing off against what you assumed was his boss.  
“He’s not in any danger, is he?”  
“Nah,” Crowley assuringly shook his head, “Beelz can’t kill him and he can’t kill Beelz. They’re just going to angrily stare at each other for a while and then go back to work.”  
“Right, do you know why Hastur took me to Hell?” You asked, investigating how much coffee had been spilt by Hastur already.  
“I think I have a slight suspicion. He’s been… different in the past few days. Very anxious, running all around the place. I think he’s been having some qualms about Armageddon.”  
“He told me you’re working on preventing it.”  
“Yep. Me and the Angel, we’ve been working on a plan. I assume you and maggot wings want to get in on it?”  
You nodded your head.  
“Ah, I knew it. You mellowed that Demon down, making him so suddenly want to stop the plan he- we’ve been working on for…” He looked at his fingers, seemingly counting, “Argh, just thinking about it makes my head hurt.”  
“Why are you willing to betray your Demon brethren, anyway?”  
His gaze went downwards again, trying to hide a faint smile.  
“Because I feel like Aziraphale would be terribly unhappy without you humans around,” he murmured.  
Aziraphale was his lovely Angel you assumed. Dearly you hoped Hasturs feelings for you were just half as strong the ones festering inside this Demon. Crowley had made you insanely curious about Aziraphale though, what kind of Angel had driven this Demon this mad? Mad enough to let go of the big plan Hell had been working on for too long and make him become a traitor towards his fellow Demons? He really must be one divine being for this.

Just hearing Crowley talking about his mysterious lover you caught secondhand feelings. Your stomach felt even lighter and warmer than before and you were probably blushing almost as much as Crowley. Desperately you tried to pull the muscles in your face to a neutral face, but you somehow couldn’t wipe the smile off of it. It seemed like Crowley's love was oozing out of his soul, taking control of you in the process.  
Both of you didn’t seem to even notice the world around, aside off that little spot of grass you both occupied.  
“Crowley, say, you didn’t happen to have miracled any… effects onto me?” You investigated.  
“Just sedated you a bit for the transport. Might have accidentally rubbed off on me, though,” he giggled, “Why? You feeling bad?”  
“The opposite, really. Suspiciously good.”  
Crowley winked.  
“See it as my thanks for working your magic on Hastur. How’s he anyway? I mean… in bed?”  
Seemed like the Demon was out to embarass you. In front of exactly two geese and a few people passing you by. All of which you weren’t aware of anyway. You tried to hide your peachy-red face behind your ice cream cone.  
“I don’t kiss and tell, human. We’re sharing secrets today,” the Demon tried to coerce information out of you.  
“Well… he’s a beginner. Don’t pretend like he didn’t tell you about it,” you answered faithfully.  
Crowley laughed heartily.  
“He did,” he admitted, “Asked me some interesting questions about human anatomy. You know, how big he should make his knob and all. Hope he didn’t overdo it.”  
Crowley and you shared another laugh. Even though he was a Demon he had an incredibly friendly aura around him. Maybe it was him deceiving you into thinking that, or maybe he just had spent enough time around humans to almost completely become one personality-wise.

“Cunts, the lot of you!” You picked up a familiar, screeching voice coming from somewhere behind you. As you turned around to look behind you, you could see some sort of dark rift that had opened almost right behind you. Slowly one leg came out of it and stomped the ground, followed by an arm.  
“Don’t you dare leaving through the back like that! Sssstay here!” Another familiar demonic voice echoed from the rift.  
Blonde strands of hair reached through the rift, followed by the rest of the Demon, who was letting out curses you had never even heard of. He sharply exhaled as he closed the rift as one would close a zipper.  
“Knew you’d be here,” he growled at both of you.  
Your heart made a jump as you looked at Hastur. Some being inside of you, that definitely wasn’t you wanted to throw yourself on him and throw your arms around his neck. The reasonable part of you, however was still miffed about his attitude towards Armageddon, even in your daze.  
“No worries, mate. I took care of your human,” Crowley bragged.  
Hastur raised an eyebrow. The sight of Crowley and you sitting amidst grass, eating ice cream and sharing anecdotes definitely wasn’t what he seemed to have expected after stepping out of that rift.  
“Hello, Hastur,” you blurped out. It definitely came out more slurred than cohesive.  
Hastur kneeled down and snapped his fingers in front of your face. His own face was sporting some kind of expression that looked like a mixture of concern and pure relief to see you. You didn’t really react to the snap, just blankly gave your best to try and focus your eyes on Hasturs face.  
“I see,” he murmured, then turned to Crowley, who offered him a well knowing smile.  
“Want me to remove it?” Crowley asked Hastur.  
Hastur looked to you.  
You lazily shook your head, which Hastur reacted to with a bemused grin.  
“Guess not,” Hastur responded to Crowley's question.  
“Y/N will snap out of it in like half an hour,” Crowley said and patted on the ground next to him. Hastur obliged and sat down with the two of you, still eying your more than suspicious activities.


	10. Creature of Doom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [💕✨🖤Matching playlist can be found here🖤 ✨💕](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/63vZvDl63yDOfVD9Xk4aB8?si=K7eax9MnRj6rrvcLOH8s8Q)   
> 

Hastur and Crowley talked for a bit, mostly catching up with each other. Although they seemed to be talking normally you could sense the bad blood between them. Your mind was too hazy to contribute anything meaningful to their demonic conversation so you decided on just listening. Hastur, still concerned about you, had pulled you towards him and pushed your head on his lap, insisting that lying down was better for your frail human anatomy than sitting.  
To nobody's surprise you quickly fell asleep, while Hasturs fingers carefully combed through your hair with the intent of calming you down.  
You awoke still secured in Hasturs lap. His hand had moved and was instead rubbing your back. The veil that had been seemingly laid over your mind had completely vanished, leaving no trace behind. You didn’t seem to recall what had happened before you fell asleep, you just knew that you were very happy about the sleep you got.

Weirdly enough Crowley and Hastur were still talking.  
“I heard you’re in the Incubus business now, eh?” The cleaner Demon of the two asked teasingly.  
Hastur groaned in response.  
“No one else to take care of that. Actually, where were you on that day?”  
Crowley suddenly went silent.  
“Exactly.”  
That was how far you managed to listen to their conversation before your head dropped into Hasturs lap again and you dozed off once again.

Not long after that you awoke for a second time, the discussion of the two Demons still going on. To keep yourself from sleeping even more you pushed yourself up, sitting down next to the other two.  
“Good morning, sleepyhead,” Crowley greeted you.  
Hastur put his hand on your head and affectionately ruffled through your hair. As you looked around you noticed the sun had already set.  
“Do humans usually sleep that long?” Hastur asked Crowley.  
Crowley shook his head in response.  
“I’m taking the blame for that. Good work on remembering the head thing though. These critters really love that.”  
Hasturs visibly puffed his chest after hearing Crowley's praise.  
“I’m quite the expert on humans now,” he bragged.  
“Noticed that. Now, I’m afraid I have to leave you both. I’ll be in touch.” With these words Crowley stood up, gave you a head pat, a bow towards Hastur, and vanished into a flurry of black smoke and feathers.  
“So…,” Hastur started, “How are you holding up? Want me to clear up your mind?”  
“I think I’m good,” you murmured in response. Really, you weren’t in the mood for small talk with Hastur.  
He soberly nodded. Something about him still seemed off, especially after the confrontation with his superior in Hell. He was even fidgier than before, playing around with his hands, drawing circles around the warts on them.  
“I… would like you to know that I wasn’t joking about what I said. I really do care about you and I care about Earth,” he nervously started, his voice trembling. He drew a deep breath. “And I would like you to know that I…”, he almost comically drew out the “I”, raising his voice. “I have never, ever, never… felt these emotions before. They’re new to me. Not for another Demon, not for a fleshbag. So please. Forgive me for being weird about this.” The last part of his rambling he spit out so fast you almost didn’t catch it.  
Softly you looked at his face. He was more hunched over than ever, staring at the ground with wide eyes, his face a shade darker than usual, seemingly mimicking blood shooting to his cheeks.  
Slowly you raised your hand to his cheek, taking care not to scare him, and gently laid your fingers down. Slowly you started stroking the rough, worn-out skin, feeling Hastur leaning into your touch with a groan.  
“It’s fine. I can imagine how hard it is dealing with emotions you’ve never had before,” you whispered reassuringly.  
“Thank you. I just thought I’d have felt everything by now,” Hastur laughed, dragging on for a bit too long for it to be a genuine laugh. You got up on your knees and shuffled closer to Hastur, close enough to put your other hand on his cheek and pull his head upwards. 

His face was scrunched up, as if in pain. His usually almost empty eyes were glassy all of a sudden and a tiny drop of red liquid rolled out of the edge of his eye. Halfway over his cheek the drop turned into a tiny maggot, crawling the rest of the way, vanishing into his collar. Slowly another tear followed on the other eye. His thin, torn lips were being forcefully bent upwards by him. You massaged his cheeks carefully, hoping your affectionate gesture would calm him down a bit. Though you were hesitant to try and wipe away the tears, not wanting to get in contact with another maggot. Instead you leaned forward and put your lips to his forehead, leaving them there for a long while before removing them again.  
Your hands crawled into his hair, caressing the straw-like blonde strands. You gave him a gentle head pat, mimicking the way he often did it to you.  
“Good Demon,” you praised him, earning a finally honest laugh from him, “Do you want to tell me about the things you saw Crowley and his Angel do?”  
He nodded excitedly.  
“I’d love to.”  
“Go ahead, then,” you encouraged him, shuffling back to your original place.  
“They went to the moving picture house together. Got some human food for the Angel and then just… sat down together and stared at the moving pictures for a while, not saying anything.”  
“You’d like to do that as well?”  
“I don’t know. I like hearing your voice and it seems like that place silences humans.”  
You giggled.  
“It’s a choice not to talk there. It’s a form of… manners I guess.”  
He nodded, the gears in his head visibly shifting, trying to think about human manners.  
“They also went to look at animals. The traitor took a lot of pictures, I think, even of himself. Can you imagine? How obnoxious and narcissistic of him, right?”  
You nodded awkwardly, thinking about the hundreds of selfies you yourself had saved on your phone.  
“I think these are called selfies. It’s fun and reassuring for humans. We send these to each other.”  
Hastur raised his eyebrows.  
“But other humans know how you look like, don’t they? Right... your memory is so bad, you forget each others appearance. I understand.”  
“It’s not that. It’s just that we enjoy looking at pictures of the people we love and care for.”  
“Then I need a picture of you!” He bolted out loudly, sudden enough to startle you.  
“You don’t have a phone, don’t you?” You asked.  
Hastur stayed silent for a while.  
“What exactly is… a phone? I think I might have one. They go like this, right?”  
Hastur mimicked the motion of sticking your finger in a rotary dial, turning it.  
“Not quite. Well yes, but these are outdated.” You rummaged around in your back pocket, pulling out your smartphone. Hastur snatched it from you, holding it close to his eyes and inspected the various buttons on it. He went through all of them, pressing them one after the other, before he finally found the one to turn the screen on. He got visibly startled by the brightness of the screen suddenly popping up, almost throwing it back to you in the process.  
“Give, I’ll unlock it,” you said as you held out your hand.  
The Demon obliged. You unlocked your phone, turned on the camera and gave it back to him. His eyes lit up as he saw himself on your screen. Slowly he moved his head around, watching his clone on the screen mirroring his every move. Patiently you let the Demon play around with it, watching him pull faces and pressing various things on the screen, accidentally taking a few blurry photos in the process.  
“Can you make one of us?”  
You nodded and took the phone from him, pressing your face towards him in an attempt to fit both of your face in the picture.  
“Smile!”  
Hastur did indeed give the camera a smile. A toothy smile, flashing his yellow-stained rotten teeth. Next to him you almost looked angelic. You snapped a picture and showed it to the Demon.  
“What a nice image of us. How do we make it appear out of the blinking box?” Curiously he stared at your phone.  
“You’d need a printer for that.”  
“Actually I think I can do this,” he murmured. He scrunched up his face, closing his eyes and started shaking his fist. A bunch of black smoke was conjured from his fist, slowly forming into a solid object. With the card-shaped object he waved away the smoke to reveal a photo, similar to a polaroid. Eagerly he opened his eyes again, seemingly very surprised and impressed at the sight of his handiwork.  
“There we go. No need for fancy technology. Take a look,” he said as he handed it to you.  
Indeed, it was the exact picture you had just taken a few moments ago.  
“Well done, Demon.”  
You handed the object back to Hastur, who promptly made it vanish into one of the pockets of the inside of his trenchcoat. You took a look around you and Hastur. The sun had already set and most of the people who had been in the park with you earlier had already long left. Hastur himself still looked like a mess, although his nerves seemed to have recovered from whatever went down in Hell after you and Crowley left.  
“So, what’s Crowley’s plan exactly?”  
Hastur seemingly rolled his eyes, although it was very difficult for you to judge whether he really did, disgusted at just the name of his colleague.  
“It’s… a long story. My lovely colleague, the Duke of Hell Ligur, and I have been investigating.”  
“I think you already told me, no?”  
“Right. I did. Anyway, we’ve discovered that the boy we thought was the Antichrist... Well, he isn’t. But Crowley managed to find the actual one and now they’re trying to decide on what to do.”  
“Just kill him.”  
“It’s not that easy. Crowley can’t kill him without getting into real trouble in Hell and the Angel’s a wimp.”  
“And now?”  
“I’m… not sure. The Angel wants to ‘talk’ to the boy. Not quite sure how that’s supposed to work out, but I’m sure wank-wings’ ineffable plan is going to work out.”


	11. Filthy/Gorgeous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope yall dont mind my chapters always being so short, it's just easier to write for me that way hahah  
> [💕✨🖤Matching playlist can be found here🖤 ✨💕](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/63vZvDl63yDOfVD9Xk4aB8?si=K7eax9MnRj6rrvcLOH8s8Q)  
> 

Chapter 11

“I believe we have some downtime until Crowley wants something from us.”  
“So? How do you want to use it?”  
“I don’t know. What do you suggest?”  
“Do you have any rituals you observed that you’d like to try out?”  
Hastur bit his lip and moved his gaze upwards. He slid his hand into his trenchcoat and pulled something out of his seemingly bottomless pockets on the inside. It was a little notebook, spewing black smoke and dust particles around, the kind you’ve already gotten to know by now. He flipped around in it, seemingly searching for a specific page.  
“I do, actually,” he said, after seemingly finding the right page in it. The Demon cleared his throat.  
“They went into stores and looked at human clothes together. Crowley had the Angel try on some. Poor bloke looked terrible. Crowley told him he’s beautiful, but I’m sure he lied,” Hastur read out his notes, then looked to you.  
You giggled at Hasturs incredibly harsh judgement of their relationship.  
“I think Crowley genuinely meant it. If you’re in love your partner always seems like the most beautiful person on earth. He’s an Angel though, they’re supposed to be beautiful, no?”  
Hastur stayed silent for a few moments, appearing to think about your statement.  
“I think you’re prettier than any Angel. Or Demon. Or Human.”  
“Thank you, that’s a really nice compliment,” you told him, “Does that mean you want to try out shopping too?”  
“Not sure. Maybe?”  
“What else is there on the list? May I see your notebook?”  
Hesitantly Hastur handed you the small book. You took it and started flipping around, looking at Hasturs notes in almost unreadable chicken scratch. Carefully he had written down the date on every page, the first page being the day you summoned him for the first time.  
“Can I read it?”  
Hastur nodded, although very cautiously. He wasn’t afraid of you mocking him, was he?

You inspected the first page. A small stick-figure was drawn on it, with an arrow pointing towards it, labelled “Human, Y/N”. Under it there was a single sentence written down: “Humans are weird”. You flipped the page, the next one was a list labelled “Things Humans like”, the bullet-points under it included things such as “Touching”, “Me?”, “Kissing” and “Handholding*”, with another star on the bottom of the page elaborating on it. “Still living hands, not cut off”.You flipped to the page Hastur was reading before, finding another list.

> “Notes on the twat and wankwings’ outings”  
> Detailed Hastur had written down, when and where the pair had met, what they did and tried to explain their behaviours.
> 
> “Twat and Angel met in park, held hands (!), ate ice cream (saw many humans eat, popular food), sat down and did nothing. Talked. Human mating rituals. Lost them.”
> 
> “Got on big wheel, Angel very excited. All humans excited. Want to, Human will like.”
> 
> “Date (As Crowley called it) at the science museum, Angel very excited. Humans seem bored, very quiet. Humans can’t talk in there? Twats kissed in front of things, Crowley nicked something, Angel yelled at him. Kept it, though. Must ask human what they want me to nick.” The last sentence was underlined.
> 
> “Went to place where humans drink. Crowley called place ‘Karaoke place’. Never heard of, ask Y/N about it. Crowley bought Angel colorful things to drink (alcohol?), bad idea. Angel got very weird, began singing. Terrible singer. Both laughed, fun activity (?). Old music, Crowley said he helped make it, don’t know what that means. Want to hear Y/N sing. Want to buy human alcohol, too. Dangerous to humans?”

“You remember where that karaoke place was?” You asked.  
Hastur nodded.  
“Wrote the address down at the back.”  
“Are you interested in experiencing it for yourself?”  
He hesitated slightly before answering.  
“I’m not sure. Do you like these things? They’re not dangerous, are they? The Angel seemed... out of it.”  
“I think he was drunk, no?”  
“Probably.”  
“Well, not dangerous per se. Moderation is the key, you know?”Hastur nodded. You didn’t know, if he really understood the concept of being drunk, but he seemed to have at least some grasp on alcohol. You wanted to open your mouth again to ask Hastur more questions, but were interrupted by someone knocking on your door. You handed the book back to Hastur and gave him a sign to wait while you went to check the door.  
To your surprise no one greeted you back, when you opened, instead you found a letter lying on the doormat. You picked it up and inspected it. Very neatly the sender had sealed it with a beautiful, vermillion-red wax seal. The seal had a big, twirly ‘A’ stamped on it. The letter neither had your address, nor the address of the sender on it, which explained the way it was delivered to you. You closed the door and took the letter to the kitchen with you, where you carefully opened it with a knife. You felt incredibly bad destroying this beautiful letter, but who sent it obviously wanted you to read it.  
Whoever sent it, had the most beautiful handwriting you had seen in your life. Every letter was beautifully curved, making every sentence look like a beautiful piece of art. They could’ve written just about anything in it and it would’ve looked poetic.

> _My dear Y/N_
> 
> _I hope this letter finds you well. I am incredibly sorry for not sending it to you in a more conventional manner, but I do not trust the English postal system to deliver it in a timely fashion._   
>  _I heard about your little love affair with the Demon known as Hastur, Duke of Hell. Indeed I was very concerned at first, fearing for your safety - I am a big lover of Humans and Earth, you must know. But - I seemed to have misjudged Hastur. My dear Crowley has told me he treats you very well and seems to have changed a lot as a person - or rather Demon. You cannot imagine how relieved I was to hear that you’re well, I would’ve taken it as personal fault if anything had happened to you._   
>  _Through my loves retelling I could feel just how much love and passion and feelings you both share for each other! You must know, dear Y/N, that I, as an Angel, am able to feel love. And just hearing about you made my heart jump and myself feel a sense of euphoria I’ve rarely ever felt, only ever stemming from Crowley. Now, he may have brought in some of his own, but do not be mistaken - I can concern your love from Crowleys!_   
>  _Human love is an incredibly intoxicating one, a beautiful one and I hereby ask you to meet with me so I can properly experience it first hand. I thoroughly love meeting and talking to humans and I would love to hear your impression on your newly-found love. My dear Crowley told me I would get along fabulously with you, and I am sure he is correct._
> 
> _I firmly told Crowley to pass by your home soon to receive your answer. We got your address from Hastur, do not think we did any suspicious investigating! He also brings information about the Antichrist with him, we have found out when and where we can anticipate Armageddon._
> 
> _Yours heartily and affectionately,_
> 
> _Aziraphale, Angel_

You took the letter back to Hastur, who was eagerly waiting for you on your bed.  
“Who’s it from?” He asked.  
“Someone called Aziraphale. Crowley’s Angel friend it seems. They have information on the Antichrist.”  
“Let me see,” Hastur demanded and snatched the letter from your hand. Disgusted he scrunched his face as he started reading the first paragraph.  
“What a sappy pansy he is. I guess you do want to meet them, right?”  
“They sound interesting. We can meet them at the karaoke bar you mentioned.”  
“I guess so,” he grumbled. Somehow he seemed less than onboard to meet with the pair.  
“It’ll be fun. I’m sure. If it’s not, we can always just leave.”  
“Fine. We’ll tell Crowley to meet us there when he stops by.”  
“Let’s see when he comes. Until then, is there anything you want to talk about? Any questions from your little book?”  
Hastur nodded and took the notebook out again. He flipped the pages, opening his mouth to say something, just to immediately close it again and go to another page a few times.

"Do you want me to change something about my assigned physical form?" He finally asked.  
You hesitated. Clearly you understood what he meant by that, but the phrasing was… odd.  
"Your physical form? Your appearance was assigned to you?"  
"Well, human, you must understand that I'm more of a concept than a physical… thing. In Hell we get assigned bodies so it's easier for us to move around Earth. We're free to change them, of course. So I was just… wondering."  
You pondered for a while. This form, this body of Hastur you've grown quite fond of. Naturally it's a kind of an acquired taste you'd expect from a Demon, but it wasn't repulsing per se. A little scary at first, but now it had this beautiful familiarity.  
"Are you happy with your body?" You asked.  
"I don't know," Hastur started reluctantly, "How do I know that I'm happy with my body?"  
"Do you like the way you look when you see yourself in the mirror?"  
"I guess I do. But I like you more. And I'm quite different from you, so that obviously must mean that I'm worse."  
"I think that's the wrong approach. Would you say Crowley is beautiful?"  
The Demon stared at you in immense disgust.  
"Of course not! He's a sorry excuse for a Demon, a vain, narcissistic twat. A traitor!"  
"Aren't you a traitor as well?"  
Hastur took a deep sigh. Your comment must've hit him quite hard, as you immediately felt sorry. You didn't want to backpedal though, as you were technically right.  
"I guess so. I'd just rather pretend I'm still the loyal Demon I used to be. You're the bad influence in this liaison, you know that?"  
He laughed heartily at his own comment. A refreshing laugh to hear from the obviously very stressed Demon.  
"To come back to your question: I think you're very handsome the way you are."  
Hastur smiled the probably warmest, most genuine smile you've received for him in your time together. His eyes closed slightly, the skin around them crinkling up. Red colour crept up his cheek, lighting up the normally pale gray skin of his face. It seemed to you as if he had been working on his human-passing smiles. Your heart made a small jump, giving you an incredibly soft and pleasurable warmth in your stomach.


End file.
